(week three)

invitations

1. 

   1. heavy rain. the invitation to watch for a pause, wait for a pause, cultivate a pause. also? the invitation to just get wet.
   
   2. a sleeveless top, then a light sweater. a touch of back and forth.
   
   3. my neighbor tells me there were two fawns but now there’s only one. likely, coyotes. the still-living fawn huddles beneath their lilac bush and this is very sweet – to rest with scented ruffles of lilacs while mama forages – but my heart hurts for the other fawn. it’s nature’s way, I know I know I know. but knowing doesn’t equal not-hurting.
   
   4. a new set of watercolors. the colors are beautiful, the internal commentary less so.
   
   5. I pull a card, unicorn. a card for curiosity, intuition, deepest wisdom. I’m hitting it out of the park curiosity-wise. intuition and deep wisdom feel more like a (timid) stepping up to plate. I loosen my grip, adjust my stance, open to the wideness-wildness-wholeness of it all. I’m here and I’m trying. really, truly, sincerely.
   
   6. the full moon, the strawberry moon. she was lovely.
   
   7. my neighbor (the same neighbor with the lilac fawn) invites us to pick blueberries from their backyard shrub. my daughter and I quickly fill two bowls, tiny globes of purply-blue, just the right sweetness. I eat them by the handful, I will make a blueberry tart.
   
   8. an old set of oil pastels that feels new. they are vibrant, creamy-textured, satisfying. I smudge and smear and realize there’s a smile on my face, a different sort of commentary.
   
   9. extra time with my three. away, home, together. that last one is where I direct my heart, past small annoyances that come with travel-fatigue-quirks. we are fortunate, we are together, we are love.
   
   10. scattered, then focused. a touch of back and forth. relaxing into the contraction and release of creative musculature, of heart-centered-living musculature. I don’t have to hit everything out of the park, need only step up to the plate, say yes to the ongoing invitation. I am here and I’m trying. (you too?) really, truly, sincerely.

   
   
   

Live in the sunshine, swim the sea, drink the wild air.
~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~